“No” is a new word in my vocabulary. While it can be very rewarding to say “Yes” to a charity or speaking engagement, for example, it is not always the best answer. Giving too much of your time (and money) or trying to fit it all in, especially in this economy, can create unnecessary stress and worry.

Recently, I found myself in a situation where I really wanted to say yes to participate as a speaker for a seminar. In fact, I did say yes. The organizer was concerned about where to fit my topic into the seminar since my time constraints were fairly set. I didn’t think it would be a problem – I can do it all, right? Yesterday I took a moment to reflect what my schedule looks like on the day of this seminar. Truly, I could have made it happen, but I would have put an undue burden on myself and the organizer to do so. Owning my piece, I contacted the organizer and told him I didn’t think it would work. Better to face that fact now than to ruin his event. And in truth, I think he was relieved as he didn’t want to turn me away, but didn’t think he could make it work within my time constraints.

The charities that I volunteer with are also finding the old Kelly who said yes to everything is now saying no more often. Sometimes I think they are a little frustrated, but my circumstances have changed. It was easy to help whenever they needed me when I didn’t have to worry about taking or picking up kids from school. When my mom was living nearby I could ask her to babysit, but I don’t have that luxury anymore.

While I feel bad, and often times guilty, for not being able to give more of my time to charity or to fit in every seminar I’m asked to participate in, there is also a sense of relief. Knowing the limits of my schedule have forced me to take a look at what I have time to do.

Prioritization has become one of my new favorite words.